Date: Thu, 9 Aug 2012 14:10:10 -0400
From: David Fruchter
Subject: [BARGE] Trip reportlet

Stuck in the car for the next few hours on the road to Atlanta (wife
driving) so I'll try to tap out a few remembrances.

Missing Redbirds:

Friday late afternoon playing 4-8 horse, much drinking has been
accomplished. David (don't call me Dave) Kuznick has rediscovered how to
play poker and is sitting with about nine stacks of blue chips and two
stacks of reds. He gets up to go to the bathroom and I immediately snatch
one of his stacks of redbirds and hide it in my rack. As David is kind of a
persnickity guy I query the table as to how long it will take him to notice
the missing chips. A debate ensues and an under/over of 45 seconds is set.
One voice chimes in noting David's Jewish heritage and wants to book "under
5 seconds".  LOLZ ensue.

I take under 45 and book about six over bets at $2 apiece from the rest of
the table. I ready the stopwatch on my phone and as soon as Kuznick's ass
hits the seat I start the timer. About a second after that Northshore Mike
(who may have never spoken a word to Kuznick in his life) begins to ask
David from accross the table how his wife Jessica is doing in the
tournament. Realizing the brilliance of this distraction ploy I start
howling about the angle shoot. The table is cracking up and the clock is
down to ten seconds when some white night at the table breaks in and asks
David if he'll sell him a stack of reds. David looks down and with three
seconds on the clock yells, "hey, where are my chips"?

The table erupts and now Northshore starts whining about the fix. A few
moments after that and I'm showered with blue chips as the bets are paid
off.

I love this barge.

Dave (now I understand why novels aren't written on smart phones) f


Date: Thu, 9 Aug 2012 22:34:00 -0400
From: David Fruchter
Subject: [BARGE] Trip reportlet #2

Technically post barge but still funny.

Monday afternoon post tax conference and I'm relaxing at the Mandalay Bay
poker room playing a little 1-2.  There's a 70 something old white guy
playing to my direct left on the hook and behind him is an attractive young
girl in her early 20s drinking a beer. At first I don't know what to think
of this but after a time the old guy mentions that he's traveling around
with his grand daughter. Sitting across from me is a 30 year old black kid.
Not quite from the hood but not from my neighborhood either.

Everybody is congenial but I don't hear a peep from the girl except to
order a second beer. Some time goes by and the old guy racks up and he and
his grand daughter leave. About a half hour goes by and the young girl
suddenly reappears and hands the black kid a folded slip of paper, smiles
sheepishly then leaves. Black kid opens the paper, smiles broadly and
immediately starts texting furiously. I ask him if he knew the girl and he
tells me that he never spoke to her and that they were just making eyes at
each other behind Gramp's back.

Next night after the conference I'm back at the game and the Black Kid sits
back down at the game. I ask him how his night went and he responds, "want
to see the pictures"?

Since we all know that without pictures it didn't happen I obviously say
"yes". Suffice it to say it happened in many different positions. Grandpa
would not have been pleased.

Black kid goes on to tell me that cute blonde is 22 years old from Texas
and has two kids. I ask him if she was married or if she just hands out a
lot of notes. Black kid decides to laugh at my quip and not stab me so I
think we bonded.

Dave f