hiya, folks!!

here's my "barge2000" trip report!  it's got some poker, some candid
observations, some unabashed opinions, and some people stories!  but
the most important thing i want to tell you is that i had so much
**fun** this last week!  :)
i haven't edited this report for tense, subject and verb, etc., but i
hope you enjoy it, anyhow!  :)



monday 7/31
my doorman buzzes me at 3:00 pm to tell me that my limo has arrived.
terrific!  except i'm not scheduled to leave until tomorrow!  lol!!  a
quick call to mitch "bfb" firestone, and we're re-confirmed for
tomorrow!



tuesday 8/01
well, the limo arrives again.  i'm packed and ready to go!  then to
mitch's apartment....but mitch is tied up - the damned fax won't go
through to japan, and his girlfriend is computer-phobic, and his partner
isn't at his computer, and (what else?)  there are a million last-moment
details that haven't yet been solved...

but we get to the airport in plenty of time for our 6:30 flight.  except
that the flight has been delayed until 7:50...."cocktails!"  i kick some
butt watching "jeopardy!"  in the bar while slugging down a few
heineken's...and it's time to board.  we finally lift off by 8:30, and
our flight west is uneventful.  sitting next to me is a young man with
leather pants, purple eyeglasses, a nose ring and magenta hair, who
actually manages to consume an entire bag of doritos before we're in the
air!

we had arranged to meet jazbo at las vegas/mccarran and give him a lift
downtown.  however, we were late and he had apparently made his own way
to the imperial palace, where he had a room for the first few nights of
his trip.  andy latto greeted me, and i gave him a hint about how to
contact alamo rent-a-car (push the little button that says "alamo" and
lift the handset).  };)

dollar rent-a-car is a cinch, and we're downtown at binion's
registration desk by 10 pm local.  in accordance with one of roy west's
rules, **we unpack** before we head downstairs to the poker room.  we're
immediately seated in a 1-5 stud game, which includes nolan dalla,
warren sander, k-fish, and david trinidad.  within an hour or two, the
game converts to 1-5 stud/8.  i drink a few beers, greet a few friends
(including supervisor tony shelton), and only lose $16 in three hours.



wednesday 8/2
breakfast at binion's buffet.  then it's off to the bellagio, where i am
seated in a 1-5 stud game.  sure enough, i'm rolled up within my first
fifteen minutes.  damn.  i win a few dollars and then i'm called for
6/12 omaha/8, with a 1/2 kill.  unlike some rooms along the mississippi,
las vegas standard rules has the killer act in turn.  after about an
hour, it's none other than oklahoma johnny hale who sits down to "play
over" the guy in the #1 seat.

"hiya, johnny!  i'm TIGER123!"
"hello, tiger687."
"no, johnny.  TIGER123, from rgp!"
"well, hello there!"

i spot a number of rgp'ers in the room, including warren sander, steve
goldman, jim mogul (who's in town on business), and jazbo.  i also spot
puggy pearson, ted forrest, and david sklansky.  sitting at my table is
a man about 6'2", balding, dressed in athletic jacket and pants.  i
later learned that his name is "murphy", but i didn't remember it at the
time.  but there was something familiar about him.  we chat a little,
and i finally ask him how long he has lived in vegas.

"oh, off and on, about 25 years."
"and you used to play stud, right?"
"yeah."
"and you used to be a regular in the 10/20 stud at the old mgm grand, right?"
"yeah."
"and you used to be a regular in the 10/20 stud at the old las vegas hilton, 
right?"
"yeah." (murphy is smiling by now)
"nice to seeya again!  what are you doing playing this omahahaha game?"
(murphy laughs) "oh, i just play for fun, now!"

i book a $40 loss in the omahahaha, and mitch and i head back downtown.

at binion's, i'm soon seated in a 4/8 omaha/8 game, with 1/2 kill.
rgp'ers jerrod ankerman and kevin "bahnzo" tarvin are to my immediate
right.  it's a fun game, and i win a few stacks of gray chips before i
cash in before dinner.

mitch and i have a "funbook" with lots of freebies and twofers.  tonight
we decide to gorge on "tony roma's" ribs and onion rings at the fremont.
ahhhhhhh.....  :)

back to binion's.  i play a little 1-5 stud with k-fish (who really is a
super nice guy who doesn't mind losing a few stacks every hour), peter
"foldem" secor, madmary and a few other rgp'ers.  then i'm called for
the 4/8 omaha/8 w/kill.  rgp'ers at the table include ken kubey, sunfish
and ratly.  there's an open seat in #5, which is soon filled by a young,
irreverent kid barely past adolesence.  this turns out to be patri
friedman, who bets and raises on just about any hand in this 4/8 game.
we get heads-up a few times, and i win all of our confrontations.  when
patri leaves for the pot-limit game, i think that he's finally given me
some begrudging respect.  i see russell rosenbloom (who *still* owes me
a dinner at the taj) in the room.  after finishing #1 in his law school
class, russell just took the bar exam.  i think that he'll pass.  };)
other rgp'ers include "action bob" huang, ross poppel, barry kornspan,
steve eisenstein, paul mcmullin, newjane, tom "rebuy" goodwin, bruce
"bigboy" kramer, and patti beadles.  i win a rack-and-a-half of gray,
and book the session.



thursday 8/3
breakfast at binion's buffet.  i greet beth even, lou krieger and a few
others, and re-meet a few californians i had met during my tour last
fall.  mitch is entered in the "history of poker" tourney, so i drive to
the mirage, looking for some real stud.  they've only got one 10/20 game
in progress, and nothing else but a 40/80.  so i'm seated at a 4/8
omaha/8 with 1/2 kill.  madmary is also at the table.  i win almost two
racks of blues before mitch and a slew of rgp'ers show up and drag me to
the buffet for dinner.

at dinner, i meet a delightful blonde named bonnie who is a co-worker of
david trindad's.  dave's wife cathy didn't make the trip, so bonnie came
instead.  i fall instantly in love with her when she announces that no
meal can ever have too much horseradish or too much garlic.  :D too bad
that she doesn't play poker.

after dinner, i go back to the 4/8 omaha/8 game, and win a few stacks of
blues before mitch and i book the session and head back downtown to
binion's.  i am soon seated in a *wild* 4/8 omaha/8 game, with jazbo,
john harkness, adam "allknight" bachrach (rosenbach?), scott byron, and
a few other rgp'ers.  i'm kicking butt when adam, on my immediate left,
cashes out and is replaced by nolan dalla.  nolan proceeds to go on a
rush, playing and raising with just about anything.  i was winning
almost $200 when he sat down, but cash out for an eight dollar win after
four hours!  lol!!


friday 8/4
breakfast at binion's buffet.  mitch is entered in the toc-style
tourney, and i greet my old buddy tom sims in the tournament area.  i
wish everyone i know "good luck" and i head back to the mirage - i want
to play some stud!  i'm immediately seated in a 10/20 stud game.  i
half- recognize the guy in #8, but i'm sure that i know the railbird who
is talking to him!  it's my old buddy "sy."  he and i used to play for
hours and hours in the 10/20 stud game at the old mgm grand, and later
at the las vegas hilton.  sy is about 60 years old, bespectacled, 5'11",
thickset, with gray hair and beard.  he remembers me at once!  it's a
good game, with dealer "sal" playing in the #1 seat.  after two hours or
so, i'm up almost four stacks of reds.  but there's this
mediterranean-type guy in #4, who plays almost every hand.  he doesn't
have a clue, but he's starting to take some of my chips.  and there's
this very pleasant california-type guy in #5, who has less of a clue
than the mediterranean, who's taking *everybody's* chips!!  i manage to
give back three of my four stacks, and run screaming to the cage!
aauuughhhh!!!!

mitch has busted out of the toc tourney, and has shown up at the mirage,
together with a bunch of rgp'ers.  but it's time to head back downtown,
'cause we have a *very* important meeting to attend.  we give a lift to
tom and amy hummel.

rgp'er adam hamilton is a britisher who has lived in scotland for the
last 20 years.  he's a computer guy who works for edinburgh university.
he plays poker.  and he drinks scotch.  in fact, adam is a member of the
"scotch malt whiskey society" and he had written to me before barge,
offering to bring me some private bottlings!  you *know* that i
accepted!  mitch and i meet adam in the poker room, pick up some bottles
of water, and head upstairs to sip some of the barley....or, as we say,
"a wee dram....."

the scotch malt whiskey society makes arrangements with various
distilleries to bottle some single-cask single malts exclusively for the
club.  adam brought three highland malts and one islay.  the protocol,
or ritual, of drinking single malt scotch was observed to a "t."  i had
bought some very large shot glasses at a nearby souvenir shop - i wasn't
going to drink adam's very fine scotch out of a plastic cup!!  adam
poured a "wee dram" of the first single malt (a highland) into three
glasses.  we "nosed" it.  ahhhhhh.....  we tasted one drop of the
undiluted scotch.  ahhhhhhhhh....  we "nosed" it again.  another drop.
aaahhhhhh....  then, we added a little pure water, to "release" some of
the aromas and flavors.  another "nose."  wow!!  another taste.  wow!!!!
and another taste....  and another....  let's try another bottle.  this
time, it's an islay (pronounced "eye-lah").  first, a little water to
cleanse the palate.  a "nose" of the pure....a taste....another nose....
a taste....a little water....another nose....a taste....another
taste....  ahhhhhhhh......  another wee dram?  why, of course!  and
another?

hehehehehehee.....as adam pointed out, "one wee dram leads to another
wee dram, which leads to another wee dram...."  :)

mitch and i agree to buy all four bottles (was there really any doubt?),
and we'll have to negotiate between us as to how to split them.  but
thank you **so** much, adam!!

the three of us have dinner at "limerick's", which is the steakhouse at
fitzgerald's casino down the block.  mitch and i pick up adam's tab.  :D

but it's back to binion's!  it's time for "team chorse"!!!  all right!!
i'm a member of "adb veterans" and i carefully pick my "adb-tiger"
baseball cap from my drawer.  i'm the stud guy, and my table includes
steve "crunch" daniel, lee jones (lee jones playing stud?), john
harkness, max roman, al weber, george wattman, dave tahijian, and russ
fox.  i figure that i've got a pretty good edge over all but steve and
dave.  but we only play 36 hands in four sessions, which really isn't
enough to allow for any real play.  in the third session, lee and i are
heads-up by fourth street.  i had raised with split kings and he had
called with a four.  i get an ace on fourth, bet, and he calls with a
four-five.  on fifth street, i get a live nine, and he hits an offsuit
eight.  he raises my bet, and i have to think a bit.
four...five...eight.  could he possibly have played a little gutshot,
caught perfect on fourth, and made the straight on fifth?  dunno.  i
call.  i pair my board ace on sixth street and bet.  lee mucks.  he
later told me that he had a pocket pair.  in the final round, i have
split aces in last position.  dave brings it in, russ folds (russ played
*exactly* one hand in the four sessions), crunch limps (uh oh....), john
limps, and max raises with the club three.  al and george fold, and i
re-raise.  dave mucks.  crunch calls cold (oh, i see.  he's
short-stacked), and so does john.  max is delighted with the action.
not much happens on fourth street, and i bet my ace.  they all call.
ugh.  i don't like the looks of this....  by fifth street, max has three
clubs on board.  crunch and john have garbage.  i'm still high with my
ace, and i bet.  crunch calls all-in; john finally mucks, and max calls.
on sixth street, max gets the king of clubs.  i check and call his bet.
i check blind.  max looks at his rivercard and checks.  max looks at me.
sorry, son, i called your bet.  what do you have?  max rolls over a pair
of jacks in the hole.....and a god-damned king on the river for two
pair.  my rivercard is a rag.  "nice hand, sir.  well played!"
hehehehehe....max *loves* the fact that he sucked out and took a big pot
from the putative stud expert at the table.  hey!  that's poker!

the team chorse tourney is a gas!  nobody played a whole lot of poker,
but the banter and socializing made this event one of the top highlights
of my week!  wtg foldem!  team "adb veterans" actually made some
money....but not as much as team "adb contenders", who kicked butt
throughout the tourney and won!!  adb roooools!!!

after the tourney, steve eisenstein invites me to play some blackjack.
i'm a little reluctant.  after all, mitch "bfb" firestone is called
"bfb" *because* "blackjack fuckin' blows!"  lol!!  steve and i wander
down to the las vegas club, a few doors away from binion's on fremont
street.  we find a table with two open seats.  i buy-in for $100 in
reds, and he buys-in for $500 in green.  *that* gets the immediate
attention of the pit boss.  after a few minutes of play, she solicits
our names.  i'm playing a 1-2-2-4 progression with $10 units, and steve
is playing green chips.  very soon, we move to the #6 and #7 seats, and
hit a streak.  yesssss!!!!  within about one hour, we're both winning
some $300, when the dealer changes.  let's get out of here!!  :)  we
both color-up and head to the cashier's cage.  steve is ready for what
happens.  he puts his eight black chips on the cashier's counter.  she
carefully looks at them, and counts them.  she then looks at steve, and
says, "one minute, please," and moves away from the counter!  huh?
what's going on here???  she gets on the phone, and actually calls
security!!!  once they verify that steve has actually won the chips, she
returns to the counter and gives steve his money.  i get my money
without incident.

i offer to buy steve a beer!  we walk to the micro-brewery/cafe in the
main street station casino around the corner from the california club.
a very tall chocolate malt porter costs me exactly one dollar!  lol!!!
i can be a sport and buy one for steve, too!  although i had gotten to
know steve slightly during atlarge2000, this was the first time that we
sat down and talked for any length of time.  he's a *very* bright guy,
who may actually be my match at a trivia game!  ;) jeez....he actually
knew the name of the midget who went to bat for the st.  louis browns
[1] and he actually guessed the uniform number that he wore [2]!!!  and
i *didn't* know who babe ruth replaced in right field when the babe came
to the yankees [3].

after a few more beers, we return to binion's.  i sit down in a *wild*
4/8 omaha/8 game, with nolan and mike paulle.  this table is **nuts**,
and as crazy as any low-limit game i saw in any indian casino or in any
california cardroom during my trip!  here's one clue:  one hand is
capped *eight* ways pre-flop....and the flop has an ace in it!!!  what
could they all have had???  lol!!!!  mike is stuck and keeps buying one
rack of grays after another.  he finally wins a hand or two, and gets
some chips back.  after one of the housekeeping attendants tidies up
around the table, mike says, "gee!  the girl took all those racks at my
feet!  i don't feel that i'm stuck as badly now!"  rofl!!!  i win a few
bucks and stagger off to bed.


saturday 8/5
i'm not really functional until several hours after noon.  the no-limit
tourney is well on its way, and all i do is socialize until banquet
time.  nuthin' wrong with that!  at the banquet, i spot marieta dalla as
soon as she enters the room.  i'd only spent about 30 seconds with her
this week, so i immediately invited her to sit next to me.  i was very
happy that she accepted!  :)  marieta is a charming and beautiful woman
who (for some unknown reason - go figure) likes me!  we hadn't spoken
since last october, when the dallas met me for a wonderful week in
mississippi and nawlins during my trip.  mike zimmers organized barge
and the banquet.  although barge itself ran like a swiss watch, i was
singularly unimpressed with mike's performance during the banquet.  i
particularly did not like the way he humiliated beth even about the
northern/southern california rivalry.  ok.  northern califoria won.
crow all you like - you've earned the bragging rights.  but making beth
dance like a marionette showed me something.  and that was confirmed a
few minutes later, when mike managed to insult dave "quick" horwitz,
*and* chris ferguson *and* mike margolis (?)  in five short minutes.  so
it goes.  i was impressed with chris.  it was apparent to me that chris
is not accustomed to speaking in public.  however, after a few minutes,
chris realized that the entire assemblage of rgp'ers really did want to
hear what he had to say, and he warmed to his audience.  wtg and
congrats, chris!

after the banquet, the 2/4 chowaha game got cranked up.  i happened to
be present when chris ferguson sat down in the seat reserved for him.
chris demonstrated his sense of humor:  he laid a ten dollar bill on the
table, and asked the dealer for chips!  rofl!!  hehehehehe....i didn't
stay for the castle-building competition.

mitch and i drive to the mirage.  i want to play some stud, but for a
number of reasons (none of which will be described here), i never get to
play.  so, i sit down in a :::::drum roll:::::  6/12 hold 'em game.  };)
and win $27 before we book the session.  back to binion's.....  'cause
there was a seat open in the 4/8 horsel game in the tourney area!  this
was the highlight of my trip!  what a gas this game was!!  my seat was
to the immediate right of max roman (he of the two-pair suckout in the
team chorse tourney), and max was *very* drunk!  we soon became friends
when i coached him through one or two stud/8 and lowball hands.  the
table was roaring, and players included jerrod ankerman, bahnzo tarvin,
susan (sabyl), nolan dalla, mike chow, ming lee, ploink, scott byron,
griz, lee (humorless, bearded west-coaster), and jeremy miller.  at one
point, i went to the little boys' room.  when i returned, peter secor
had sat down in my seat, and was playing my chips!  :)  and he was
toking my chips, too!  :D and he managed to find a red amongst my grays,
which he quickly delivered to the cocktail waitress.  ;)
hehehehehehe...i wasn't the only player to (ahem) benefit from peter's
experience.  peter played nolan's chips for a while, and he played
jeremy's chips for a while, and he played somebody else's chips, too!!
lol!!!  eventually, mitch joined the table to my immediate right.  i
wish that i could remember anything specific that happened at this game.
i just can't.  i was laughing my ass off most of the time, and drinking
beers and scotch the rest of the time!  during the week, i had learned
that the bar was stocked with "knockando" single malt scotch, which is
an excellent highland malt.  :)  guess what i was ordering?  once or
twice, supervisor tony shelton wandered over to our table, and at least
once when he did so, i called for a "floor toke!"  an hour or two later,
tony showed up with a stack of doughnuts for us, so mitch and i
celebrated the night with a breakfast of "knockando and doughnuts"!!!!
lol!!!!  the game only cost me $102, virtually all of which went to
tokes.  :)  some time around 11 am, i had to go back to the room....



sunday 8/6
too late for breakfast.

mitch and i were very slow starters today.  what a week!  we had a
burger and beer at the main street plaza microbrewery.  for five bucks,
we got to sample five five-ounce glasses of each of their specialties!
all right!!  i go back upstairs to pack, and mitch tries another session
of the 4/8 horsel game, which is still going strong!

we say goodbye to as many folks as we can find, and pick up jazbo at the
bellagio.  he had played some 30/60 with rgp'er sgt.  rock and columnist
roy cooke (whom jazbo described as "tighter than mason!").  we all get
to mccarran in time for our respective flights, and the week is ended.
:(

foldem secor is noted for saying that "you are allowed to have fun in
the casino!"  i surely followed his advice!  :)  let's do it again next
year!!


tiger

(trivia answers)
[1] eddie gaedel
[2] 1/8
[3] a fellow named george "papa bear" halas